Dealing Effectively with a Career Setback

Could we draw out what a regimen might look like, on an individual level, that I could put together if I’ve just experienced a major career setback?

I think the first thing is, if it’s a career setback, was it actually the right thing for you anyway? We can get carried away in the excitement and allure and romanticisation that this is the very best job for you. It might be; it might not be. By the way, this is not so you can post-rationalise and say, “It wasn’t the job for me.” I mean honestly, was that the thing I’d really set my heart on? If the answer is, “Absolutely, it was, and it’s really what I want to do,” then what could I have done differently? Second thing: what could I have done differently that might have changed the outcome? And I’m thinking of getting a job or not getting a job; a black and white thing.

Understanding and asking, getting the feedback, “Why was X chosen over me?” and really understanding that. Any good company will give you that information, and that’s important to you because that then informs you that actually, the reason they went for the other person was they had, in this case, five years more direct experience than I had. That’s a rational decision.

That’s then supporting the thesis, “Is this about me or not?” Yes, it’s about you at one level, but actually, it was a rational choice on the part of the firm. I don’t like their decision, but it was a rational choice. If I put myself in their position, would I have chosen me, given the facts? Maybe not. Understanding the reality of the situation is important, notwithstanding the disappointment.

And then, in addition, what am I going to do differently? Not just at that event, but what am I going to do differently going forward? Understanding there is still a world of opportunity. Most people in most companies have quite a blinkered view of the world, understandably. It’s full-on, it’s what I’m doing. It’s head-down, and that’s the way it has to be.

But outside, there’s an awful lot of other opportunities, and really understanding, is this a time to make a change or not? It’s always surprising in companies when you hear, “Oh, you heard X and Y left to join another company; they’ve done really well, and we didn’t rate them at all.” You hear that a lot, so I go back to the point; people are not suddenly unsuccessful. A failure must not define them. A different environment, part of the organisation, whatever it is — there are still plenty of opportunities if you adopt the right attitude, listen to the feedback, and accept you’re not perfect.